Dear Maggie Montclair,
It isn't even the middle of February, and I've already broken all six of my New Year's Resolutions!
To be honest, I broke them all by the middle of January. To make matters worse, my resolutions weren't impossible day dreams. They were all things I should be doing to improve my health and my finances. I just don't have any willpower. Please check with Gertie and see how her friends solve this 'will power' problem.
No Will Power in Palm Beach
Dear No Will Power,
You aren't alone in the 'will power' department. Statistics show that you are actually in the vast majority. I have done some research on resolutions and found that most people set too high of standards for themselves.
We all want to be slim with beautiful hair and flawless skin. We want to spend our money wisely and solve all our financial issues. We all want faithful friends and adoring male companions. Our resolutions usually reflect these desires. Is it possible to become this person? When you try to change six things at once--that is a lot of pressure and a BIG change from your normal routine.Not a good plan. M
P.S. Gertie's brother's neighbor's aunt needed to get serious about losing some weight. She set small goals for herself, and as each goal was met, she treated herself to something other than food. A new hairstyle, new shoes, a piece of jewelry. Always something nice that she could look at and be reminded of her success. By the end of the year, she was well on her way to looking and feeling the way she had pictured herself on that previous New Year's day.
Gertie's bridge partner's cousin needed to clean house. She was getting close to living like the hoarders on television. Everyone was worried about her. They finally talked her into seeing a therapist who specialized in the disorder. Together they began the long process of organizing her home.
Her sister had wanted to send her away for a week and just take several boxes of garbage bags into her home and get the job done. But, most of the way we live is by habit. According to specialists, changing habits take a minimum of twenty one days. We all have quirks, and some border on mental disorders. Be honest with yourself and decide if the changes you want are changes that you can make without help from experts. If you can do it on your own, more power to you. Get the job done! If you need advise, do as the greeting cards say and 'put on your big girl panties,' and ask for help. Do what it takes to be the person you really want to be.
When all my resolutions failed, I looked them over very carefully and decided there was only one that I actually cared enough about to go to the work of making it happen. I'm working on it this year!
