Saturday, April 21, 2012

Dear Maggie Montclair,

  I have been widowed for six months and am truly struggling every day.  I just finished reading your book, which was very helpful and enjoyable reading.  My problem is that I live in a small town, under 500 people, and we don't have grieving groups etc.

  I do have two widowed friends who still work, so I don't get to see them often.  I feel like I am a burden to my family because I am so sad.  If it weren't for my grandchildren, I possibly wouldn't leave the house.  I go to all their activities.  Can you offer any suggestions?
                                                       Small Town Girl




Dear Small Town Girl,

  You are among the newly widowed, so this is your toughest time.  You will feel better as you make plans for this new phase in your life.

  Look around your small town.  Are you lucky enough to still have an elementary school?  If so, check with the principal and see where you can be of use.  It might be in the lunch room or checking papers or listening to students read.  Schools always  need  volunteers,

  Do you have a nursing home or assisted living facility?  Residents love to play BINGO, and they often need a caller or volunteers to help the seniors play.  Many need help with correspondence, and some enjoy being read to.  Women get a big lift just by having their nails polished.

  Every town has organizations that need help.  Your church is a good place to start.  Scout troops appreciate learning how to crochet, decorate cupcakes or other fun ideas that may be a specialty of yours. I always recommend volunteering because you are not only helping others, but you are doing yourself a world of good.  In fact, most find that they benefit even more than those they are helping.

  Your working friends would probably enjoy getting together once a week because even though they are busy working, they still need to be with other people just for fun.  Give them a call, and make some plans. I know you will be able to think of more fun things to do and ways to help others

  Share SURVIVING WIDOWHOOD WITH MAGGIE MONTCLAIR with your children so they will understand what they can do to help you move away from your grief and back to a full life.  Your grandchildren are lucky to have you as they will learn a valuable life lesson by watching how you reach out to others.

  Each day is a new opportunity to make yourself happy.  God Bless You.
                                                                    M                                                                                      




P.S   Gertie's piano teacher's cousin's aunt loved animals and always had at least one dog.  After she was widowed, it was necessary to sell her home and move to an apartment.  They didn't allow dogs, so she found another way to enjoy her four footed friends.

  She can be found every Saturday morning walking dogs for the Humane Society.  Not only does she get to enjoy the dogs, she has met a whole new group of friends.  When they finish walking, they enjoy lunch and conversation.  So, she gets to be with dogs, she gets some exercise, and she has a lunch date with new friends.  What a great way to start the weekend!