Dear Maggie Montclair,
I read your book and am doing all the things you suggest. Although I am busy, I still feel empty inside. What more can I do to make myself feel whole again? I am not truly happy because I still miss Jim. When will that go away?
Still lonely and missing him
Dear Still Missing,
Being busy, volunteering, traveling and doing fun activities are what you do while time passses. The pain will fade but never be completely gone. As I remind widows in my book, grief is not like the flu. You don't get over it, you learn to live with it. M
Gertie says: Time helps, but I don't think we ever get over the fact that we feel cheated. This is not the way we planned to live out our life. We expected to grow old together. To enjoy the grandchildren together. To retire and spend our leisure time together. Now the "together" is gone and we miss that warm body on the other side of the bed.
Of course we will always carry that sadness with us. And that is alright if we don't let it dominate the rest of our days on earth. We can't let that disappointment and sadness keep us from noticing the good things that we still have in our lives. Now, more than ever before, we must count our blessings.
